On Watching My Daughter Mother

I am in Maryland. Since Saturday we have been at our daughter Patrea’s house staying until last night when we came to the University of Maryland University College where Carl is attending a conference. Yesterday we visited the Huntley Meadow’s Nature Preserve and Mt. Vernon with Patrea and her two little boys. She is expecting a little girl in August. Being with her brought back so many memories of my mothering days–the delight of unexpected hugs and kisses, the drain of tired, cross children, the joy of a child’s new feat, the giggles, the whining, the magic, the mystery, the frustration. Everything that comes in the parenting package.
Sadly, I find that my long days of quiet study and solitude have made me impatient with incessant questions from an adorable five year old. Yet, I watched my daughter as she patiently and gently dealt with each question, each concern, each challenge. Her love spills over into the answers she gives even when it is the fourth time a question has been asked. Even though she is pregnant she has much more energy than I have to keep up with the boys physically, and I realize why it is wise to have children while we are young. But besides the physical, maybe another reason we have children when we are young is so that we have time to watch our children parent. It truly is a delight to watch my daughters and son nurture and love their children. They are doing a much better job than I ever did. And to all of you out there raising children, a great big hooray! You are doing God’s work and even though the frustrations are many, the payoffs are incredible.
The child that now saps your energy will someday spend that energy to give someone else love and life. So invest well. Give them all you can, while you can. The child rearing days are over faster than you think and life moves on. You won’t miss the whining and the crying at bed time. But you will miss the hugs, the giggles, the prayers, the whispered secrets, and even the knock-knock jokes.