All These Things . . .

While I was sick a few weeks ago with the flu and pneumonia all at the same time, I had some dark moments when I wasn't sure I was going to make it. One night I awoke and had to use the bathroom. I was so weak it took great effort to walk the twenty-five or so feet to the room, but afterward I found myself too weak to make it back. I fell to the floor and lay there a long time finally falling asleep.

On the cold carpet before I slept vexing thoughts began to bombard me. I had a high fever. I could barely function. But I had faith to be healed. So why wasn't I healed? I knew God had the power to heal me so why didn't He? Why was I so sick? Why hadn't the priesthood blessing pronounced upon me that I would experience a miracle come to pass? Why was God letting this happen to me?

But as the thoughts began to come, I began to recite a scripture the gist of which is found several places in scripture including Romans 8:28, "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God." Actually I wasn't quoting the whole verse. In my weakened state I just kept saying, "All things work together for good. This must be for my good. There is something about being too weak to get to the bed and something about being this sick that is good for me."

The thoughts finally faded and I slept. After awhile the cold awoke me and by then I had gathered enough strength to make it to the bed. But the feelings and encouragement that the words I had recited stayed with me and helped me endure. Over and over I kept repeating snatches of scripture such as, "All these things shall give thee experience and shall be for thy good" (D&C 122:7).

I was aware how much the words were helping me at the time. I could feel them lifting and helping me. But looking back now, I am even more grateful that I knew those words and was able to call upon them to give me the strength and encouragement I needed. It is only now that the trial is past that I am beginning to realize what I learned from this experience and why it was important that I learn those things. It is also only now and looking back that I realize that a miracle did happen. No I didn't heal instantaneously, but the miracle is I did not die. I came close, but I did not die and that is a miracle.

Last night Elder Bednar gave an amazing talk at a CES fireside on this very subject and if you did not hear it go to this site and watch or listen to it. It answers so many questions about the relationship between faith and adversity and encourages us to endure whatever adversity befalls us with faith, hope and charity.