Change Your Focus

Distraction is my mother's favorite Truth Tool to use. (Did I tell you she fell last week and broke her sternum and had to have five stitches in her hand. She had barely gotten back to normal from when she fell last year and broke eleven ribs and her clavicle!) She is a trooper! She is 86 years old and is spry and feisty. She is amazing. I just hope to be as courageous and valiant as she is when I get her age--if I do.

While distraction can be a great Truth Tool there are two cautions. Distraction can be a problem at times like when you are driving a car. The other problem is that when using it we need to be sure we aren't avoiding a problem. The way to tell is that distraction is momentary--a way to clear your mind so you can deal with whatever is vexing you. Avoidance is seeking after pleasure in order to avoid the problem completely.

When using distraction to combat vexation you pay close attention to vexation and as soon as you feel it instead of dwelling on it and making things worse, you change your focus from the thing that is distressing you to something else. You do something that takes your mind off the vexation,but as soon as you've relaxed you go back to the problem and solve it. Go read a book, take a walk, call a friend, write a letter, do whatever you LIKE that will keep your mind off what is vexing you.

It is surprising that often even fifteen or thirty minutes of distraction can give you a new perspective, and make you feel better.

Sabbath Scripture

Whether therefore ye eat, 

or drink, 

or whatsoever ye do, 

do all to the glory of God.

1 Corinthians 10:31

Truth Tool - Good Courage

When Moses left the Children of Israel and Joshua became the new leader, the Lord gave Joshua a charge:

“Have not I commanded thee? 

Be strong and of a good courage; 

be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: 

for the Lord thy God is with thee withersoever thou goest” 

(Joshua 1:9). 

I love this charge, which the Lord later gave to all the House of Israel, and since I am part of the House of Israel, I consider it my charge also.

But one day while I was contemplating this verse some things jumped out at me and hitting me over the head as if saying, “Look!” The first of thing that struck me was that this is not simply good advice, it is a commandment from the Lord. It is a command to not fear, and to not get discouraged. But even the command not to be fearful seemed strange. To me having courage meant to be brave and so did not being afraid. Why the redundancy? And why did the Lord find it necessary to define courage with the adjective good? Is there such a thing as bad courage?

It took me awhile, but I finally discovered that at the time the King James translators were translating the Bible the word courage meant “feelings and passions of the heart” and not bravery. Thus any emotion was courage, and so the Lord is charging Joshua (and us) to only have good feelings in our hearts.

But that presents a big problem. How can we go through our days with the media, other people saying and doing things and only let the good feelings into our hearts? Don’t bad feelings sometimes overpower us? The answer to that is in the last sentence. The reason we can do it is because the Lord is with us where ever we go or whatever we do. Despite the bad and evil in the world, we can cast it all away because we know there is a Savior who will eventually heal this world and all the righteous in it.

Understanding this charge to only let good feelings into your heart is a powerful Truth Tool. It can be used in time of vexation by simply repeating the words, or as a preventative Tool to recite every day in order to avoid vexation. I have rewritten the charge in modern English and put my own name in it. I have it laminated and carry it around in my wallet where I can refer to it any time vexation starts to overwhelm me. I also have it on a mirror that I see every morning. I have found that there is a power I can literally feel envelop me every time I simply recite the words out loud.

A Little More Affirmation

It is obvious how the Truth Tools help us drop the Unnecessary Pain in our lives. The Tools change how we think, and thus we let go of the thought that is causing us Pain and move on. But the Truth Tools are also very effective for helping us deal with Necessary Pain.

For example, yesterday we talked about the Truth Tool Affirmation and how it helps us both avoid and rid ourselves of Unnecessary Pain. But Affirmation also strengthens and encourages us so that we can pass through the Necessary Pain of life valiantly.

When dealing with Necessary Pain the power comes not from Affirming your own strength, but from Affirming the strength of God. Paul said it best, "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" (Philippians 4:13). Other Affirmations that help us endure the Necessary Pain of life are: "I have a Savior who strengthens me," "Yoked with the Savior I can endure anything." Again, just saying these words with conviction strengthens and empowers.

There are many ways to word Affirmations, but the important thing is to acknowledge that there is a strength beyond our own supporting and helping us. That is the most powerful Affirmation there is.

Truth Tool - Affirmation

One of the ways to keep ourselves out of the Pit of Illusion and to avoid vexation is to use a Truth Tool called Affirmation.

But to understand how to use Affirmation we need to first understand a little about how the mind works. The mind does not compute the command “don’t.” When we tell ourselves things like, “Don’t hurt!” or “Don’t eat that!” or “Don’t hold this grudge!” it doesn’t work because the mind only calculates “do.” Try imagining not eating that donut. Just my mentioning this made you see yourself eating the donut. You may have imagined setting it down after a bit, but you first imagine eating it. You simply can’t imagine not doing something. A wise friend once told me never to say to a newly licensed, teenage driver as she backs out of the driveway, “Don’t hit the mailbox” because as soon as you say it, the mental picture of hitting the mailbox pops into her head, and the next thing you know a dented car hovers over a fallen mailbox while you try to console the hysterical driver.

So as we try to redirect our behavior or to overcome negative feelings, the most important thing we can do is replace the negative thought with a positive, Affirming, thought. “I eat healthy foods.” “I feel good.” “I forgive him.” As we come to understand this principle we realize that our negative and positive thoughts and feelings are powerful. But the most important thing to realize is that when given enough time, the positives will always have power over the negatives. The prime example of that is the Atonement, the most positive event of all time which will eventually overcome all negatives. But remember, positive encouragement takes time. A forceful, manipulative, negative approach to get someone to do what you want them to do may intimidate them into doing it faster, but it will always generate negative feelings in the other person that can fester and cause more problems—usually worse problems. On the other hand, a positive, loving approach may take more time, but it will last and generate positive feelings in the other person and in yourself.

Keeping your self-talk Affirming and positive can help you conquer and avoid Unnecessary Pain, and being Affirmative with others can strengthen relationships.You don't have to take my word for it. Right now say out loud, "I can't do this." Repeat it several times and notice how you feel inside. Now repeat out loud, "I can do this!" Say it several times and stop to notice how you feel inside. Just saying the words without even thinking about something you are doing creates a different feeling inside you. The Affirmative words, "I can do this!" make you feel good and confident--they encourage you.

So when negative words about yourself or others creep into your head, use the Truth Tool, Affirmation, and quickly turn the negative into positive.

Tools of the Trade

I hope you've been paying attention to the stories you are telling yourself. I also hope you are determining whether what you are saying is the Truth and nothing but the Truth, or an Illusion, what you think should be instead of what is? If your story is not the Truth then you need to drop it and how to do that brings us to the subject of Truth Tools.

Truth Tools are strategies that help us get rid of the vexing thoughts that plague us when we are in the Pit of Illusion

Truth Tools are meant to help us move out of Illusion and into a neutral position where the Spirit can then help us Live in Truth. But one of the first things we learn as we begin to use the Tools is that one tool can't do it all.

Just as a carpenter building a house needs more than just a hammer, you and I need more than one Tool to help us Live in Truth.  If one tool doesn't work in a situation,  you try another until you find one that works.

Some of the Truth Tools I’ve identified and use are:

Anchoring

Humor

Music

Rewriting

Questioning

Distraction

Good Courage

Affirmation

Whenever you feel negative emotions such as fear, worry, stress, anger, self-pity, sorrow, or envy pushing you into the Pit of Illusion, pick one of the Truth Tools and use it to get rid of the negative emotion. Once the negative feelings are gone you can move into the positive.  It is a lot easier than trying to go from negative directly to positive. Once in the Realm of Truth you can experience  happiness, joy, love, and peace which are always available when Living in Truth.

Cows and Cuds

Rumination is a fun word to say. Say it out loud and see how it rumbles around in your mouth as it tickles your tongue with soft vibrations and finally exists your mouth in a slow swishhhh.

The word ruminate comes from the Latin ruminari which means “to chew the cud.” In other words, a cow ruminates. Or to put it more graphically, the cow regurgitates a cud, which is food it has already swallowed that has been semi-digested into a cud, and then it chews on it—again. Sounds pretty disgusting, but before that disgusting scrunched look on your face goes away think about how much ruminating you do. Yes, YOU! People ruminate, but instead of a wad of regurgitated grass in our mouths, we ruminate with regurgitated words in our heads. This is what storytelling is all about.

Besides meaning “to chew again what has been chewed slightly and swallowed” the word ruminate also means “to go over in the mind repeatedly.” The problem with rumination is that it is usually regurgitated negative stories that we tell ourselves over and over again. “I can’t do anything right.” Or ,“My parents shouldn't have mistreated me.” Or, “I’m not a very good parent.” or "My neighbors shouldn't be so messy," or "My spouse should appreciate me more." I don’t need to list more, you get the idea.

Rumination is terrible when we tell ourselves stories based on lies like these. But the Good News! is that unlike cows, we don’t have to ruminate. When the old stories, the word cud, begins to regurgitate we can spit it out and refuse to chew on it. The best way to do that is to replace the old cud with something new. For example when the old cud, “I can’t do anything right,” comes up, you spit it out and instead chew on the idea, “I made a mistake, but I’ve learned from that and it won’t happen again.” That thought tastes a lot better, and it will lead you on to brighter and more delicious things.

Negative Storytelling only generates Unnecessary Pain and accomplishes nothing good. So spit out the story and Live in Truth.