I wish I had the words to express all I am learning from Grizelda. But I am afraid that much of what I learn comes to me without words, and I can’t always adequately express what it is I know. But one thing that stands out in this experience is what I am learning about spiritual growth.
Confronting Grizelda has been a journey through dark, troubling places. But there are patterns in nature that teach us about the value of dark, troubling places. A caterpillar makes its own dark, tight place in which it endures for awhile and then miraculously comes out a butterfly. Imagine going from crawling laboriously along the ground to suddenly being able to fly! A flower struggles for weeks or months in the dark, deep soil before finally pushing up out of the ground to blossom and bask in the sunlight. A baby gestates for nine long months in the dark, depths of a mother’s womb—crowded, tight, waiting for the painful escape.
Likewise, enduring the worry, the stress, the pain, the unknown is a kind of dark, troubling experience that I know is changing me. Just as I can feel exercise make my body stronger, while traveling this journey I feel my spirit growing stronger. I am leaving behind old habits and old ways of negative thinking that limit and restrict me. I know I am being transformed and though I have a long, long way to go still, I am exhilarated by the knowledge that the Lord loves me enough to change me into something better. I hope this doesn’t sound like I’m bragging. That is not the intent. I'm far from what I eventually want to be. Instead I am trying to share my joy at what I am discovering about how the Lord works.
I am beginning to understand what the poet William Cowper meant when he wrote, “God moves in a mysterious way, his wonders to perform.”
I think I know what you mean, Sherrie. My circumstances are different, but I know about those dark, troubling places, and I can feel myself changing, too.
ReplyDeleteNo one could ever think you were bragging--I think everyone appreciates you sharing what you're learning through this process. And I always appreciate your unique insights from nature and the world around us. (But even if you were bragging, it's your blog--and you would be allowed!) :)
ReplyDeleteMartha, Isn't it beautiful! Maybe we should call them magical places instead of dark, troubling places!!!
ReplyDeleteWendi, Thanks for the vote of confidence!
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful thought. And you have reminded me of a profound spiritual truth: increased spirituality cannot be taught, it has to be gained through righteous living in times of trial and affliction. You are awesome!!
ReplyDeleteAnita, I'm not awesome, but the gospel sure is!!! Thanks for adding this thought It is so true.
ReplyDelete