Living in Truth

One of the problems we encounter when we first attempt to Live in Truth is that we have been so conditioned in the ways of Illusion. All our lives we’ve seen the same reaction to the same situations so we don’t even stop to realize there could be a different way to handle the situation.

For example, a friend of mine lived with her older married sister during her last years of high school. One day Sharon asked her sister if she could take the car to visit some friends. The sister said she could but she needed the car back by four o’clock because she was taping an educational TV show for a local channel. Sharon said she’d be back by four and left, but once with her friends she forgot all about the time—until it was six o’clock.

She hurried home, but her sister was gone. On the table was a freshly baked cake, Sharon’s favorite chocolate cake, with a note that said, “Don’t worry. I know you were having a good time. I managed to get a ride. I love you.”

In a situation like this most of us have only seen someone react in anger. So when someone lets us down or doesn’t keep a promise, we do what we’ve always seen done—we get angry. But all that does is raise our blood pressure, make us tense and fill us with vexation. Instead Sharon’s sister used that energy to bake a cake. You don’t have to have an IQ of 160 to know which reaction causes the offending person to be sorry and learn a lesson. Being late with the car never happened again and many, many years later the lesson Sharon learned that day is still in her heart guiding and directing her.

But what about the sister? By baking a cake instead of getting angry she escaped a great deal of unnecessary pain. She stayed in the realm of Truth where the spirit dwells. She went to the TV taping with positive energy instead of depleted from the vexation.

Sometimes when we feel anger swelling in us all we need to do to stay in Truth is ask ourselves the simple question, “How else could I handle this?” and then do something good with the energy building within us.

Birthday's a Coming!

The big day is fast approaching! But forget about days--Tomorrow is my birthday month and I'm going to celebrate BIG. Thanks to all of you who have already given me a present by putting your beautiful pictures on my Followers menu to the left here. I really do like it. So many wonderful friends!!!! If you haven't done it already, please help me celebrate and add yourself on.

I'm beginning my birthday month by counting all the blessings of age.

Today I am thankful that wrinkles don't hurt! Such a blessing!

Bitter Into Sweet

One of the exciting things about the gospel of Jesus Christ is how the Atonement can make bitter into sweet. As we grow closer to the Savior we find that He doesn't only help us through the trials of our lives and fill our future with tender mercies, He changes the past. I don't know how He performs this miracle, but things that were once negative, horrible memories are changed. Sometimes we see them differently. Perhaps we see how we were part of the problem or we understand why someone else did such a terrible thing. Sometimes we are just able to let the memories go. It is like they are erased or at least the dark emotions attached to the experience are erased. Other times I'm not sure what happens, but with the love of the Lord in us the memories no long hurt but are somehow seen as a needed learning experiences. We actually are grateful for what the experience taught us.

I'm not sure how the Savior does it, but I am so thankful for the way He changes the bitter from my past into sweet.

Beauty: A Conscience at Peace

One of the best novels I’ve ever read is a retelling of “Beauty and the Beast,” written by Robin McKinley and titled, Beauty. The story you already know, but the characterization, writing, and wisdom conveyed is extraordinary. One scene especially has stuck with me because of the great lesson it teaches.In the story the father trespasses the estate of the Beast and takes a rose from the Beast’s garden. Because of this transgression, the Beast demands that the father send his daughter to live with the Beast or he can sacrifice his own life. When the father returns and tells his family what has happened his daughter, Beauty, has a choice to make. She can go live with the Beast or she can send her father to his death. The logic of the world would tell us that he was the one that got himself into the mess so he should be the one to suffer.

Beauty, however, feels that she should go, and does what her heart is telling her to do. In telling her story, Beauty repeats the following dialogue that takes place when she first goes to live with the Beast but before she has come to know him.

The Beast says, “'Would it help perhaps if I told you that, had your father returned to me alone, I would have sent him on his way unharmed?'

“'You would?” I said: it was half a shriek, “You mean that I came here for nothing?'

"A shadowy movement like the shaking of a great shaggy head. 'No. Not what you would count as nothing. He would have returned to you, and you would have been glad, but you also would have been ashamed, because you had sent him, as you thought, to his death. Your shame would have grown until you came to hate the sight of your father, because he reminded you of a deed you hated, and hated yourself for. In time it would have ruined your peace and happiness, and at last your mind and heart.'” (Robin McKinley, Beauty [New York: Pocket Books, 1979], 115.)

When we live in Truth and do what our heart and conscience directs, we are free of the vexation the Beast identifies here. We are free to love, to live in peace, to progress, and especially to enjoy life.

Encouragement

The word courage didn’t always mean bravery. At the time the King James translator’s were doing their work on the Bible, the word courage meant “feelings or passions of the heart.” Thus when the word is used in the scriptures we often find it preceded by the adjective good. God wants us to have “good courage” or “only good feelings and passions of the heart.”

This is especially interesting when we look at the word encouragement. The suffix –ment means “process of.” The prefix en- means to “put into.” So if we use the original definition encouragement is “the process of putting good feelings or passions of the heart into.”

As we surround ourselves with all that is good we can overcome much of the despair and disappointment that exist in the world. When we are confronted with the negative things of life we can counter the negative by clinging to the positive good things around us. Good music. Good friends. Good books. Good thoughts. These are just some of the things that can encourage and lift us.

Joy

Most of us think of joy as an emotion—a state of happiness or felicity. While that is true, like so many words in the scriptures, there are other meanings that sometimes apply to the concept of joy when the word is used in the scriptures. When the scriptures tell us, “Let the saints shout for joy” (Ps. 132:9), it probably means happiness. But when Paul says, “Ye became followers of us, and of the lord, having received the word in much affliction, with joy of the Holy Ghost,” we get the feeling there is more than simple emotion invoked here. This joy doesn’t come from our own heart or mind, it comes from the Holy Ghost. When the Savior says, “I come to thee; and these things I speak in the world, that they might have my joy fulfilled in themselves” (John 17:13), we know that this joy isn’t just feeling good. This joy is a power that is God’s and something He shares with us. This is confirmed in Galatians 5:22-23 when Paul teaches us that “the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance; against such there is no law.

The dictionary helps us out here. Actually the first definition of joy is “the emotion evoked by well-being, success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires.” While this definition is still tied to emotion, we see a little more. Joy comes from the prospect of possessing what one desires and in the gospel context what we desire is to have the Spirit with us. As we put the scriptural verses about joy together, we realize that joy is the feeling we have within us when we are in possession of the Holy Ghost. Thus joy is more than an emotion similar to happiness;it is a state of being near to God.

Bad Advice

Today is the 43^rd anniversary of mine and Mr. J’s first date. It was a blind date that I didn’t want to go on and so I got unready thinking I was being spiteful to the friend who was making me go. Needless to say, the friend didn’t suffer in the least. But I came home that night and cried because I was sure he’d never ask me out again. However, miracles happen (that’s a whole different story!) and he asked me out the next day and the next and the next and before I knew it I was engaged and everyone was giving me marriage advice.

The advice I got the most often sounded so profound: “Don’t ever go to bed on an argument.” So when we got married, and had disagreements we remembered the advice and tried to work out our problems before we went to bed. What a MISTAKE! Both Mr. J and I get grumpy and ornery when we are tired and trying to solve problems late at night before we could go to bed was ridiculous. We’d be up half the night and never come to anything close to resolution.

After several years we got wise, (I know I’m a slow learner!) disregarded the terrible advice, and just went to bed. Miraculously 90% of the time the next morning we found the problem had somehow disappeared while we slept. The other 10% of the time we were able to solve the problem quickly because our minds were clear and alert.

The amazing thing to me is that a few years later I found this very principle taught by Nephi. After Nephi has the beautiful vision of the Tree of Life, he returns to the family camp and finds his brothers fighting. He knows he needs to help solve the problem, but he is exhausted from the experience he has just had. So instead of trying to jump in and solve the problem in his tired state, he tells us “after I had received strength I spake unto my brethren” (1 Nephi 15:6).

Now that’s the advice I should have been given. Trying to solve problems with children or spouses or anyone when you are tired or hungry or out of sorts doesn’t work. Like Nephi we need to wait until we have the strength to deal with the problem. That isn’t always possible, but when it is—do it!