The Cheerful Command

In the Doctrine and Covenants section 123 there is a wonderful phrase that encourages and instructs. It says, “Let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power.” The section is talking about how to proceed despite the persecution, wrongs committed against the saints, and the adversity they encounter. The revelation was given to Joseph Smith while he was incarcerated in Liberty Jail undergoing some of the worst persecution of his life.

The encouragement to go on striving and enduring and doing whatever is in our power for good and for righteousness is wonderful, but the thing that strikes me is that we are to do all those things cheerfully. I’m not real good at cheerful, but I want to get better at it. That’s one of the reasons I’ve studied Truth and identified the Truth Tools is because I need help in this area—it doesn’t come naturally to me. But over the last few years I’ve felt myself growing and changing and so I know cheerful is possible to learn.

This possibility of change is what Moroni is talking about when he tells us that the Lord will “make weak things become strong unto” you (Ether 12:27). Growth and change are difficult, but not impossible because we have the help of the Lord—He will make it happen if we just keep trying. And that thought helps me do all things cheerfully!

Finding Santa in March

I worked so hard Saturday that I forgot to write my blog. Sorry about that, but I have a fun story to tell because of it.

We moved into our home almost fourteen years ago. The week we moved in, BYU called and asked me to teach a class the next semester which began that same week. Needless to say I was a bit frazzled trying to pack up, move, unpack AND get a syllabus ready and lesson plans done so I could  teach. Somehow everything got done, but I'm not sure how. Unpacking went slowly (It took months!) and I only managed to stay one lesson ahead of the students. But I loved it.

However, in the course of that hectic move several things were lost. About six years later I found a box that had some paintings in it that I was very happy to reclaim. Well, part of the busy this last Saturday included cleaning the garage which was long over due for a cleaning. We took a hugh load to DI and filled a garbage can to overflowing and still haven't finished the job. But in going through everything to decide what to keep and what to toss, I opened a garbage sack that had been stuffed high on a shelf behind our old sleeping bags (which we haven't used in fourteen years!) and found a three foot high Santa Claus that D8 had made for me just before we moved. I was so excited I started to cry!

Every Christmas for the last fourteen years I've wished for that cute Santa. I figured that since I had packed it in a black garbage bag someone who was helping us move must have thought it was garbage and had thrown it out. I've felt awful about it, but now I'm rejoicing because I have it back.

I can't believe how happy it has made me and it also made me realize that it isn't just the big things in life that make us happy.  Sometimes very small things can give us a big dose of joy!

58 Years of Pain Gone!

Two years ago after I presented the last class of the Living in Truth seminar at the Brigham Young University Campus Education Week, several people came up to talk to me and as I spoke to them I could see a man who had been in the audience all week standing at his seat without making any indication that he was leaving. I finished talking to all the people, gathered up my notes and computer and started out of the classroom, but he was still there. I smiled as I passed him, but he didn't say a word. Instead he handed me a folded piece of paper.

I thanked him but still he didn't seem to want to talk so I moved on. Once out to my car, I opened the note. Across the top in big letters it said, "Thank you!" Below that is a little smaller script it said, "Fifty-eight years of pain gone!" There was no signature or any other words on the paper, but it brought tears to my eyes--tears of joy.

Awhile later I received an email from his wife telling me about the change the principles of Living in Truth had made in her husband and even later he wrote to tell me his story. It was a beautiful story of letting go of the past and moving on. I treasure that first note and his story. As a matter of fact it hangs on the wall over my desk at work where I can see it often. That isn't the only letter or life Living in Truth has changed for the better, but I often don't get to hear the whole story like I did that time. I just get notes thanking me or brief messages explaining the peace and happiness that has been found, but to hear the whole story made this experience stick out in my memory.

I know what a difference Living in Truth has made in my life and it was such a joy to find that someone else had been helped by the principles.

I've written off and on on Good News! about the principles of Living in Truth, but as 2013 begins I want to take a more systematic approach by starting at the beginning and explaining what it means to Live in Truth and give examples and stories of those whose lives have changed for the better by simply learning to take what comes and love it!

I hope you'll help me spread the Good News! by inviting others to drop in and learn what it means to Live in Truth!

This is the year to find peace and joy!

Happy, Salty Tears

Did you ever wake up feeling so happy and blessed that you break out in tears? I've never had that happen before, but today is the day.

It is so strange because it is the thought of salt that makes me cry, and as the tears trickle over my cheeks I remember that tears are salty and cry even more because more salt make me think about Mary "salting" and swaddling her child. I see her tenderly cradling her son, and I feel her love because I've cradled a son and daughters and I know that intense feeling--it's so much a part of me that it's not just in my heart, it's in my bones and muscles and flows in my blood. It's me.

As I feel that love I think about how the child Mary cradled would grow to be a man and that the love Mary felt for Him would be so different from the hate the world would throw at Him. That hate became so intense they crucified Him, and He allowed it to happen--because of me. He sacrificed Himself for me! And then I shed more salty tears and think about how all the sacrifices under the law of Moses were salted and that the salting of His swaddling was a foreshadowing of His sacrifice.

I don't know why this research on salt has affected me so very much, but it has. Everything I see and do reminds me of salt. Besides eating it every day as I watched people throwing salt on their sidewalks and driveways during the recent storm so that the ice would melt, I remembered all the times the Savior has melted the iciness in me.

In short, dozens of times a day I encounter salt and think of my Savior so that my heart is full to overflowing. And this morning it's all spilling out.

Happy Words

Our bodies are amazing. Our bodies are made up of trillions of cells that work together to keep us alive and functioning. Each cell has its own tasks to perform, but at the same time all cells are dependent on other cells in order to function. Each cell "understands" exactly what to do and some, such as the white blood cells, actually sacrifice themselves for the good of the whole body.

But even more interesting is the fact that our cells communicate with each other through electrical messaging that is conducted by minerals and chemicals that act as neurotransmitters. These neurotransmitters flow through every cell in the body and transmit messages through out the body. This means that if you are thinking happy words and thoughts that happiness is communicated to every cell in your body. Happiness isn't only about your heart or your mind. Every cell is influenced by positive words and thoughts.

This Is Happy

Benjamin Franklin once said, "Happiness consists more in small conveniences or pleasures that occur every day, than in great pieces of good fortune that happen but seldom."

I love that quote because I realize that for years my own unhappiness was caused because I was always waiting for something big to make me happy. Then, at the infrequent times when something big did happen, I found the happiness so fleeting that it never satisfied me enough.

Since I've been Living in Truth I've found myself going through my day and when certain things happen suddenly thinking, "That is happy!" I didn't decide I was going to look for happy things, instead it simply happened--I just found myself doing it. I decided it must be one of the benefits of Living in Truth. But I love this new part of my being.

I feel the warm water trickle over me in the shower and think, "That is happy!" I cuddle into a downy soft comforter to go to bed and think, "That is happy!" I let the bitter-sweet taste of dark chocolate melt in my mouth and think, "That is happy!" And right now thinking of you, my unseen friends, out there reading what I love to write about I'm thinking, "This is happy!"

I'm Grateful For Gratitude!

Happiness researchers have identified eight reasons that cultivating an “Attitude of Gratitude” makes people happier. Many of these eight reasons are intuitive and are things we’ve all thought about. But some aren’t. For example, happiness researcher Sonya Lyubomirsky says that expressing gratitude bolsters self-worth and self-esteem. Why? Because when you concentrate on how much people have done for you, how many good things have happened in your life, or how many things you have accomplished you feel more loved and confident.

Lyubomirsky also explains that the research clearly shows that living with an “Attitude of Gratitude” encourages moral behavior. This happens because grateful people are aware of what even a small gesture of kindness means to them and they in turn are eager to reciprocate. They go about their days naturally doing small and large acts of kindness for others and in other ways doing all kinds of good.

Another result of a gratitude attitude is that it builds social bonds because it tends to strengthen existing relationships and nurtures new ones. Several studies have shown that people who feel gratitude toward others, even if they don’t express it, experience higher quality relationships with those people.

We all know the wonderful feeling that comes when we express gratitude, but there are many other benefits to living with an Attitude of Gratitude.

Feeling Gratitude

A researcher who has spent his career studying gratitude, Robert Emmons, defines gratitude as "a felt sense of wonder, thankfulness, and appreciation for life." This definition helps us understand that gratitude is a lot more than saying, "Thank you!" True gratitude is an emotion that underlies everything we do. It is what Paul meant when he told the Ephesians to give "thanks always for all things." Yes, we are to say "Thank you!" but even more we are to feel "Thank you!"

Recent research has shed new light on what the scriptures have told us all along--that people who are grateful are happier, more hopeful, and have more positive emotions. But one finding that surprised me
is that people who are grateful have more energy.

One study asked a control group to daily record five hassles or major events that had occurred to them that day. The other group was asked to record five things for which they were grateful for that day. After only ten days compared to the control group the gratitude group showed more optimism, more satisfaction with their lives, fewer health problems such as headache, coughing or nausea, and they exercised more.

Thinking about what we are grateful for is powerful, but even more benefit comes if we live as grateful people--feel the wonder, feel the appreciation, feel the joy!

Seeing Through Truth

If you've read Good News! for very long you know I love how C. S. Lewis explains Christianity. One of my favorite quotes of his is: "I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else."

This applies to Christianity and it also applies to Living in Truth. When I am Living in Truth and am safely out of the Pit of Illusion I see Truth--the verity of life--very clearly, but I also see everything else through Truth.

 It is amazing what viewing life through Truth does for my peace and confidence and joy.

Happy Now

Take the Happy Road. Live in Truth!

The Tibetan Buddhist saint Milarepa once said, "All worldly pursuits have but one unavoidable and inevitable end, which is sorrow." When I first heard that I strongly disagreed with it, but then I read some commentary on what the good saint meant and changed my mind.

While it is true that there is a sense of happiness and joy when we achieve any of our worldly goals such as obtaining a college degree, or being offered a dream job, or finding a new friend, or finally being able to buy that long awaited get-away cabin, what Milarepa meant was that any of those joys are fleeting. After the exhilaration of graduation is over, or the first few weeks on the job reveal that it is going to be harder than you thought, or you have your first disagreement with the new friend, or you discover that the cabin roof leaks and needs major repairs the happiness and joy are gone. It seems that each thing in life that we desire and seek after to make us happy comes with its own set of problems.

But when we Live in Truth we aren't seeking after things in order to make us happy. We seek after things in order to learn and grow, but we find happiness in every moment of the journey. It is so wonderful to realize that we don't have to wait for happiness to come to us. We are happy now!

Take the Happiness Road

I’ve been reviewing the academic literature on happiness studies and found something that verifies what Living in Truth is all about. The study showed that happy people don’t just sit around being content. Instead happy people make things happen. They are active in seeking out new understanding. They seek new achievements and experiences. AND they control their thoughts and feelings. They have developed ways to push the negative thoughts out of their minds and consciously seek positive thoughts which they savor.

That’s what the Truth Tools are all about—a way to push out the negative and make way for the positive.

The conclusion of the study is that happiness is something we make, not something we encounter. And as we’ve learned from Living in Truth, happiness is available in any given moment if we choose the Happiness Road and Live in Truth.

Out of the Pit

Living in Truth means living with what is, or in other words accepting the verities of life. The opposite is living in Illusion which is living with what is not, or in other words expecting life to be different than what it is. When we live in Illusion it always feels like we’ve falled into a Pit and thus I call it the Pit of Illusion. That deep, dark Pit has some symptoms that we should all be aware of because recognizing them helps us know we are inflicting pain upon ourselves. Remember, it is always possible to get out of the Pit and out of the pain. Falling into the Pit is a choice and therefore climbing out is also a choice. Therefore, the symptoms of the Pit are like a fever, they warn us that something needs to be done to cure the symptoms and change the course we are on.

Here are the symptoms:

(1) When in the Pit of Illusion there is no light. I’m not talking about visible light, but we feel darkness and all the negative, vexing feelings that go along with heavy, depressing darkness.

(2) When we are in the Pit we feel alone and separate from everyone around us. We feel friendless and unloved.

(3) When we are in the Pit negative emotions overwhelm us so that we feel helpless. It seems that nothing we do will help.

(4) When we are in the Pit we feel like God has abandoned us. The truth is that God always dwells and is found in Truth, therefore we are the ones who have removed ourselves from God. He is the God of Truth and so when we are in the Pit it makes it very difficult to hear and feel the promptings of His Spirit.

When we feel any or all of these symptoms it is time to pull out the Tool Box of Truth Tools and go to work. Remember, there is always a way out of the Pit of Illusion!

The Happiness Choice

Before you read anything else stop and ask yourself the question:

 "What do I need so I can be happier?" 

Think about it carefully, and write your answer down.

 Now you can go on.

Most of us answer the happiness question with something like, a new job, more money, a better boss, more free time, a new home, or a better relationship with my spouse. But all of those things are about life circumstances and research has shown that only 10% of our happiness is determined by circumstances. Another 50% is determined by our happiness set-point which is determined by our genetic make-up and hereditary training. In other words, how our brain is wired and how we have been programed to think by the people who raised us. The most important factor in this research is that 40% of our happiness is determined by our own choices.

Most of the psychologists doing this research claim there is nothing we can do about the 50% and 10%, but that we have total control over the 40%. I disagree. Although it takes a lot of effort, we also have some control over how we react to our circumstances and we can eventually change our set-point. The way that is done is by consistently making choices that make us happy. For example, instead of waking daily and fretting (vexing) over the fact that our house is too small and we need a house in a more affluent neighborhood, we wake each morning grateful to have a house and looking for ways to serve the people around us.

Now look at what you wrote down and decide where it fits in this discussion and determine what you need to really do to be happier.

Yes, it takes mental exertion and work to change attitudes, but it can make all the difference in the world whether we are happy or not. No one can make you happy. Happiness is a choice and only you have the power to choose it.

The Supernatural Power of Family

This has been a summer of travel and family and I'm loving every minute of it. Last week I had five of my daughters here and we went to lunch together. And the last few days I've been in Tennessee to see my grandson who just returned from a mission and to attend the temple with his brother who is just  leaving on a mission. Talk about happy days! There is nothing like being with family especially when those family members are making such good life choices.

As we finished the temple session and stood together talking it was all I could do to keep my heart in my chest! I had my daughter and three grandsons with me in the temple. Since most of my children live far away I haven't had the opportunity to do a lot of things with them and so being with them at that special time was very especially wonderful.

Sometimes the stress and work a family involves makes us forget how very wonderful family is. Living together in such a close relationship also presents opportunities for hurt feelings and problems that can keep us from enjoying family ties. But when we learn to let those negative things go and concentrate on the love and happiness part of family, the joy that comes from those relationships is extraordinary and amazing (something beyond this world!). I don't have words to explain it, but I can feel it. It is real and wonderful.

Don't Disparage The Good Stuff

Any of you who are over the age of six have encountered “cheesy” sayings and wall plagues such as “Smile and the world smiles with you” that often cause us to roll our eyes in disgust. “Cheesy,” “Pollyanna,” “trite,” “unrealistic,” are just a few of the thoughts that pass through our minds. But surrounding ourselves with positive thoughts and thinking positive thoughts has been proven to increase positive thinking and happiness.

So why do we cringe when we see these sayings posted? What is it that makes us smirk and make light of them? Perhaps it is because the adversary knows they can encourage people and so he instills the disdain in us. 

Next time you are tempted to turn up your nose at catchy, happy statements remember the value and instead of demeaning them, enjoy them. Even that simple act can make all the difference in your day!

Give Goodness

It’s a proven fact that when we make other people happy, we make ourselves happier.

When we hear that statement the tempter usually counters with thoughts of having to take a lot of time to do kind deeds or wrap up and give presents or write letters or notes or other "burdensome" things. (Burdensome is the way the tempter presents it!)

But you don’t need to go out of your way or do special things to make other people happy. There are many ways in normal every day interaction that we can spread goodness.

One thing we can do is to concentrate on how we react to the people we encounter every day and then make sure we share happiness and cheer. Do we smile at people? Do we share encouraging news and keep the bad to ourselves? Do we compliment people we are talking to? Are we sincerely interested in our associates and their families? Do we really listen to them? Do we respond to what they say in ways that indicated we really are interested?

Sharing goodness and happiness doesn’t have to be a burdensome, time consuming task. We can share goodness any time we want and in many different ways..

Happy Times!

Enough about negative emotions! Today I want to look at positive emotions. Too often we don’t stop to analyze positive emotions. We feel good. We feel happy. So that’s all that matters. We are content. But when we are feeling positive emotion, we have a wonderful opportunity to learn more about positive feelings if we just take the time to notice a few things.

For example, next time you are feeling really good about something stop and ask yourself why. Solidify in your mind exactly what it was that made you feel good. The something doesn’t need to be big. Sometimes our happiest moments are caused by little things such as watching one of our children lovingly help a sibling. Take note of the fact that the happiness occurred because you were satisfied with what happened. Satisfaction is key to all happiness and so learning to be satisfied will bring more happiness.

Also notice that your thoughts were so occupied by what occurred that you totally pushed aside any bad thoughts such as worry about bills or stress over a task that needed to be done. In other words, part of the happiness was caused not just because of the good thing that happened but because you didn’t think about other things in that moment—you focused on the good. That is an important discovery because too often we think happiness is something that occasionally falls upon us without realizing that we have a big part to play in making it happen and making it last.

By stopping to analyze what is happening when we feel happy we solidify and deepen the feelings and it helps us look for and enjoy more of these kind of happy moments. Thus being aware of what we are doing and thinking in happy times increases our chances of having more of those good times!

Sure Happiness

Sometimes life is deceptive. For example, we look at happy people and after talking with them for a while we realize that they are also very grateful people. The gratitude seeps into their conversation not in a scripted way, but naturally as if it bubbles out of them whether they want it to or not. So we go away thinking they are happy because they have so much to be grateful for. That is the illusion!

If you talk longer or get to know these people more you realize they are not grateful because they are happy, they are happy because they are grateful. The secret to happiness and love is gratitude. Gratitude is also the secret to Living in Truth. When we are looking for those Golden Goods and rejoice in them, and give thanks for them, we are happy and filled with love.

In short, happiness does not ensure gratitude, but gratitude always ensures happiness.

My Delight

I was just sitting here thinking, “I need chocolate.” Mind you, I stay away from sugar because sugar doesn’t like me—it makes me sick. The other strange thing about this thought is that I’ve never liked chocolate. All my life if given a choice I’ve gone with caramel, never chocolate. But the last year I’ve fallen in love with dark chocolate which I seldom get to eat because as I told you, sugar doesn’t like me. But now I find myself wanting it every once in awhile and today when the wanting came I realize it isn’t the eating of the chocolate as much as it is the comfort of the chocolate that is so appealing. There is something very consoling about the rich flavor of the dark chocolate melting over the tongue, bringing the taste buds to life, tantalizing the nose with the found-nowhere-else rich scent that chocolate possesses, and teasing me with the bitter yet sweet dilemma that dark chocolate causes.

So I am about to give in and have one square of my very favorite, Amano, dark chocolate (I’ll try Dos Rios today!) and while it melts in my mouth I’m going to savor the flavor and the feelings and the gratitude it fills me with.

God put some wonderful things on this earth. Which of his creations is filling you with delight today?

Remembering!

The people who have given me such wonderful memories!

On Mother's Day I was overcome with a flood of memories of all the good times I've experienced as a mother. My mind floated through the years and landed on sock wars, Family Home Evening pantomimes, camping trips, dancing in the rain, playing machines, picnics at Mueller Park, story telling, and especially moments when I snuggled my toddlers close and listened to them giggle. I was in tears most of the afternoon as all these thoughts and many others danced in my mind.

Then on Monday I received a gift in the mail from D6. She had taken some of our old VHS family movies and converted them to DVDs. It was the best gift I've ever been given and as I watched three hours of home video so many more memories came dancing into my head. My head is a family tango! But the best part is how thinking about all these wonderful things has made me feel.

Too often in the past I've been guilty of remember the worst of the past instead of the best. But I'm here to tell you that by forgetting the worst and dwelling on the best it makes every moment of life richer and happier, and it infuses hope into the soul. After all, the past is over and we can't do anything about it so why stew over it? Instead relish every good thing from the past and watch how it enhances the present and the future.

There is power in doing this!!!!