Be Perfect? Ouch!!!

We are all familiar with the scriptural injunction to be perfect. As the Savior instructed, "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect" (Matthew 5:48).But there is a lot of misunderstand as to what that means.

 

Later, after His resurrection, the Savior gives this same command to the Nephites but He adds something significant. In 3 Nephi 12:48 He says, "Therefore I would that ye should be perfect even as I, or your Father who is in heaven is perfect." The important question here is why didn't He include Himself in the command when He delivered it to the people before His death?

 

The key to understanding is in the definition of the word perfect. The first definition in the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary is, "Being entirely without fault or defect." In other words "being flawless." (That's where the OUCH!!! comes in.)  But the second definition says, "Satisfying all requirements." I'm thankful that's the definition of the Greek word that is translated in our New Testament as perfect and it is the definition intended in the scriptures! And how do we know?

Remember before His resurrection the Savior challenged us to be perfect like our Father in Heaven is perfect. But after His resurrection He includes Himself and asks us to be perfect like our Father in Heaven and like He is. Jesus was at all times flawless, so if that was the meaning He could have included Himself the first time. But when he first challenges us to be perfect He had not yet "satisfied all the requirements." That didn't happen until He was resurrected. Only then was He perfect or completed. 

 

Being perfect in a gospel sense isn't about flawlessness. God knew we couldn't be flawless and so He provided a Savior for us. But He wants us to be completed in that we receive all the covenants, and we won't receive them all in this life. We, like our Savior, need to move on to the next life and be resurrected before we will be completed.

Now that certainly is GOOD NEWS! Forget about working to be completely flawless or feeling shame because you aren't flawless or trying to put on a front so others think you are flawless. Instead, relax and concentrate on being your wonderful, natural, flawed self that is working toward completion. There is so much peace and hope in that!

58 Years of Pain Gone!

Two years ago after I presented the last class of the Living in Truth seminar at the Brigham Young University Campus Education Week, several people came up to talk to me and as I spoke to them I could see a man who had been in the audience all week standing at his seat without making any indication that he was leaving. I finished talking to all the people, gathered up my notes and computer and started out of the classroom, but he was still there. I smiled as I passed him, but he didn't say a word. Instead he handed me a folded piece of paper.

I thanked him but still he didn't seem to want to talk so I moved on. Once out to my car, I opened the note. Across the top in big letters it said, "Thank you!" Below that is a little smaller script it said, "Fifty-eight years of pain gone!" There was no signature or any other words on the paper, but it brought tears to my eyes--tears of joy.

Awhile later I received an email from his wife telling me about the change the principles of Living in Truth had made in her husband and even later he wrote to tell me his story. It was a beautiful story of letting go of the past and moving on. I treasure that first note and his story. As a matter of fact it hangs on the wall over my desk at work where I can see it often. That isn't the only letter or life Living in Truth has changed for the better, but I often don't get to hear the whole story like I did that time. I just get notes thanking me or brief messages explaining the peace and happiness that has been found, but to hear the whole story made this experience stick out in my memory.

I know what a difference Living in Truth has made in my life and it was such a joy to find that someone else had been helped by the principles.

I've written off and on on Good News! about the principles of Living in Truth, but as 2013 begins I want to take a more systematic approach by starting at the beginning and explaining what it means to Live in Truth and give examples and stories of those whose lives have changed for the better by simply learning to take what comes and love it!

I hope you'll help me spread the Good News! by inviting others to drop in and learn what it means to Live in Truth!

This is the year to find peace and joy!

A Job, A Career, or A Calling?

When a person Lives in Truth, which means he or she is living in the present moment, amazing things happen. One of those things is that we feel a peaceful sense of who we are and what we are to do. It is as if we are being called to a higher calling, but there is no stress or worry associated with the feeling, simply a peace in knowing what we are about.

To understand this better let's look at the distinction sociologists make between a job, a career, and a calling. A job is something you do for money or for some other reason you feel like you have to do it. You'd rather be doing something else, but to eat or fulfill others expectations you do it. A career you do because you are seeking advancement. You are after the promotions that will make you feel better than the people around you--being "above" or "over" everyone else is what motivates you. A

calling, on the other hand, is performed because something deep inside you says this is the thing to do. You want to contribute to help others to make things better.

With a job, if there is no reward involved the person won't do the job. With a career, if there is no chance to be elevated over others the person begins to look elsewhere or goes numb. With a calling when obstacles arise the person's determination intensifies and they try even harder.

When we Live in Truth we know our calling and respond to it because we are in touch with our highest self and despite adversity, trials, temptations or what other obstacles life offers us we understand the Good News! that there is something more than money or prestige or power and that knowledge gives us peace to do and be what we are called to do and be.

Marathoners

It's been a marathon day. Not for me, but D4 came to town to run the Provo marathon and Mr. J and I drove the course getting to places just before her, staying long enough to take her picture, cheer her on and then we'd jump in the car and drive to the next convenient stopping place on the course.

I admire you runners! What a gruelling sport, but she finished in good time and it has been fun to have her in town for a few days.

I've learned a lot from watching her. The thing I admire most is that while there are a few marathon runners who run to win, the majority run to finish. Their goal is simply to say, "I did it!" We need more of that attitude in life. So many people would be so much happier if instead of comparing themselves to others and always feeling like they had to be best, they simple did what they wanted to do in the way they can do it best and then be happy because they did it. If more people were content with being themselves instead of trying to be better than someone else we'd make the world a better place!

D4 is on the left.

Way to go, D4! You did it! You are a person who runs!

What? Be Perfect!

We are all too familiar with the scriptural injunction to be perfect. As the Savior instructed, "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect" (Matthew 5:48). But when He issured this same command in 3 Nephi 12:48 He changed it by saying, "Therefore I would that ye should be perfect even as I, or your Father who is in heaven is perfect." The important question here is why the difference.

The key to understanding is in the definition of the word perfect. The first definition in the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary is, "being entirely without fault or defect." In otherwords flawless. (OUCH!!!)  But the second definition says, "satisfying all requirements." I'm thankful that's the definition intended in these scriptures! And how do we know?

Remember before His resurrection the Savior challenged us to be perfect like our Father in Heaven is perfect. But after His resurrection He includes Himself in the example and asks us to be perfect like our Father in Heaven and like He is. Jesus was at all times flawless, but he had not "satisfied all the requirements" until he was resurrected. Only then was He perfect (completed).

Being perfect in a gospel sense isn't about flawlessness. God knew we couldn't be flawless and so He provided a Savior for us. But He wants us to be completed in that we receive all the covenants, and we won't receive them all in this life. We, like our Savior, need to move on to the next life and be resurrected before we will be completed.

Now that certainly is GOOD NEWS! Forget about working to be completely flawless or feeling shame because you aren't flawless or trying to put on a frontso others will think you are flawless. Instead, relax and concentrate on being your wonderful, natural, flawed self that is working toward completion. There is so much peace and hope in that!

Striving Against Difficulties

In Helaman 3 we are told that the problems of the people that lead to war and destruction begin with contention. And when the Savior appears to the Nephites He tells them three times in his first instruction to them not to let any contention occur. Usually when we hear that word contention we think of arguing or fighting with other people, but the first definition of the word contend in my dictionary is “To strive or vie in rivalry against difficulties.” The second definition is, “To strive in debate.” And the third is, “To struggle for.”

The first definitions in dictionaries are the primary definitions, so what we discover here is that the primary definition of contend is to “strive against difficulties” which is what we do when we create unnecessary pain. It is no wonder the Savior admonishes us so many times to avoid contention. He isn’t just talking about arguing with others, or struggling against others, He is talking about creating unnecessary pain for ourselves. 

Contention throws us into the Pit of Illusion and makes life miserable. By refusing to contend, we stay in Truth and enjoy peace.

The Benefits

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to Live in Truth and I find myself making a long list as I go through my day. When you Live in Truth you live in gratitude which brings a love for and appreciation of all the things around you. Living in Truth brings a contentment and peace. It brings a joy that comes from the Spirit because when you Live in Truth, you live where the Spirit is. 

These are just a few of the many things that come from Living in Truth that I’ve thought of today, but each day brings new discoveries about the blessings that come from Living in Truth. What things have you discovered about Living in Truth?

A Lesson in Truth from a Blue Heron

Many of the situations in life that vex us come from other people. Someone slanders us, or misrepresents us, or treats us ill for some reason such as jealousy. In those situations the temptation is to seek revenge or at least to set the record straight by loudly proclaiming our innocence. But any thoughts of retaliation will only vex us more—it’s like taking poison in order to cure pneumonia. Vengence only cause us more pain—Unnecessary Pain.

But if you trust in the Lord to work His justice and mercy, you leave all in His hands. Sometimes that means He leads the person to repent and change. If the person refuses and clings to his negative behavior, you can trust in the fact that he will receive the justice due. In the meantime, you have nothing to fret about. You are free from Unnecessary Pain and at peace. This peace is part of what the Savior means when He invites us to enter into His rest. As Mormon teaches us in Moroni 7:3, “Wherefore, I would speak unto you that are the peaceable followers of the church, that are the peaceable followers of Christ, and that have obtained a sufficient hope by which ye can enter into the rest of the Lord.”

In nature we find a situation that illustrates this. When an eagle stalks a grey heron, the heron doesn’t always run or try to escape. Instead, it calmly faces its enemy without vexation. At any point the eagle can refuse to attack, but if it attacks, the heron raises its lance-like bill and the mighty eagle, by the force of its own attack, is often impaled.

From the perspective of the eagle, the story obviously teaches that those who hurt others hurt themselves. But there is also a lesson to be learned from the heron. When we Live in Truth and refuse to be vexed by the actions of others, Truth, like the heron’s bill, will save us.

Interestingly, in 1775 the 1st Continental Congress issued a three dollar bill with the image of an eagle skewered through the neck by a heron’s bill. The motto on the bill read "Exitus in dubio est" which means “The outcome is in doubt.” From a mortal point of view the heron (or the person calmly Living in Truth) does seem to be the underdog, but like the heron the Colonists beat the British just as those who live in Truth will eventually conquer all enemies.

Peace Like A River

I’ve always been intrigued with the promise found in Isaiah 66:12 “For thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will extend peace to her like a river…” The reason this interests me is because most rivers aren’t peaceful. Oh, once in awhile you see a slow, easy flowing river, but for the most part rivers travel downhill and that means rapids and currents and crashing into rocks, trees and other debris encountered along the way. This made me wonder what the Lord meant by “peace like a river.”

Then it occurred to me that what I am seeing is only the surface of the water. And what the eye beholds is not all that exists. Especially in a deep river, underneath the bubbly, rolling surface the waters are peaceful. There the fish swim in calm waters. Underneath the rapids there is tranquility like what is found under the giant waves of the sea.

There is a beautiful analogy here. When we Live in Truth life “bubbles” around us with stresses and worries. The busy current of life is fraught with dire situations and adversity. But when we live in Truth there is peace at our core and that peace provides power and energy to strengthen our resolves and a calm that guides us through the bustling activity on the outside.

After discovering this metaphor, I was delighted one day to find an album by one of my favorite artists, Christopher Parkening, entitled Grace Like A River that is a wonderful Truth Tool. Parkening is a classical guitarist and the songs on this album help us remember that the peace of the river and the peace within us is a gift, it is the enabling power or grace of God. Of course I bought the album and every time I play it I experience more delight as I remember the metaphor of the river and feel Parkening’s music convey grace and love into the very marrow of my bone to increase the peace that flows deep within.

Truth Works!

We’ve talked a lot about how to Live in Truth when relating to other people. But what about Living in Truth with ourselves? Remember living in Truth means living with what is—accepting and dealing with the verities of telestial life. Remember “Truth is knowledge of things as they are, and as they were, and as they are to come; And whatsoever is more or less than this is the spirit of that wicked one who was a liar from the beginning” (D&C 93:24-25).

So what does this mean? Let’s use a few examples to illustrate. Let’s say someone drops by unexpectedly and you haven’t yet done breakfast dishes. The Truth is not, “I’m such a terrible housekeeper.” The Truth is simply that you haven’t done breakfast dishes yet. Let’s say your child does something wrong like take something out of someone’s desk at school. The Truth is not, “I’m failing as a mother. I’m a terrible mother!” The Truth is simply that your child did something they shouldn’t and it is time for you to do some valuable teaching. One more example, you are supposed to provide dinner for a family because the mother just had surgery and you forget it until eight o’clock when you suddenly remembered and took them Domino’s pizza. The Truth is not, “I am a horrible person. I can’t do anything right. I mess up every time.” The simple truth is you forgot until 8 o’clock when you remembered.

When we are confronted with Truth the options are always “Fix it or live with it.” And as you can see, each of our examples are easily fixed IF you simply accept the truth and deal with it. Do the dishes, teach the child about honesty, get the dinner there as soon as you remember. Everyone has lapses of memory. Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone occasionally makes wrong decisions. It is part of our mortal experience and Living in Truth means we just deal with it.

But when you move from Truth into the Pit of Illusion and start thinking you are horrible or terrible or no good because of your mistakes, that is more than Truth and “is the spirit of that wicked one who was a liar from the beginning.” When you think thoughts like this you remove yourself from the Spirit of Truth and the very help you need to deal with the problems at hand.

We all make mistakes. We all have bad days. But we accept what happens, love what is, and stay in the realm of Truth because peace, love, and joy are only found only in the realm of Truth.

Do Not Fear

In Luke chapter 21 we find the disciples asking the Savior about what will happen when Jerusalem is destroyed. Jesus tells them to beware of impostors because others will come professing to be Christ. Then he tells them that they will hear of “wars and commotions” but adds, “be not terrified: for these things must first come to pass” (Luke 21:9).

We live in a similar time when floods, earthquakes, wars, and all manner of adversity afflicts and torments. But if we trust in the Savior and simply do what He has instructed us to do we need not be terrified. There is no need to fear. Even in trying times if we live in Truth we can live in peace and joy.

Grizelda Be Gone!

Today is the day! At 1:30 p.m. They will do the MRI to see if Grizelda has been eradicated. I won’t get the results until Monday at 1:00 when I meet with the doctor. It is a strange feeling to know that there has been a tumor—an intruder—in my head that I hope is gone, but I don’t know for sure. And it’s even stranger to think that if Grizelda is still there she could affect the entire rest of my life, and yet I can’t see her or know what she is doing. That probably sounds weird to you, but I have been blessed with an incredible peace, so I’m not worried or stressed by Grizelda; I’m only curious. (As you know, I have an overactive imagination and things like this do send me to wondering.)

I am grateful for the peace. It has been an extraordinary blessing that has given me the beautiful assurance that whatever they find today, God is in charge and He will take care of me. I don’t need to worry. So I’m going to enjoy the music of the MRI machine and have myself an adventure today! I’ll let you know how it goes!

A Place of Restoration

I’m going to the Manti temple today and I’m excited. It was the place where forty-two years ago this month we were married. My grandfather was also president of the Manti temple for eleven years and so between those two things, going to the Manti temple feels like going home.

I have two favorite definitions of a temple. The first is that it is a place set aside by a prophet for observation. What a blessing to be able to step out of the busy, hectic, chaotic world and have a quiet, reverent place to think about heavenly things. But even better than thinking about them a temple is a place where I feel heavenly things.

The second definition of a temple that I love is that a temple is a place where one gets one’s bearings on the universe. It is so easy in this age of bombarding information to get your head so full of negative things that your thinking is warped and your attitudes poisoned. And since actions proceed from attitudes, that can tarnish a life. Going to the temple helps me keep an eternal perspective and to remember that God is in charge. He created this world. He will lead and guide me through it.

I always come out of the temple feeling the Savior’s words in every fiber of my being: “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” (John 14:27). What a gift temples are!

When Others Disappoint Us

One of the things that keeps us from living in Truth and one of the most difficult things to deal with in life is when other people disappoint us. We want our children to do well in school. We want our neighbors to be honest with us. We want to be able to trust the people we do business with. But everyone has their own agency and sometimes they make mistakes intentionally deceive and those things can be very disappointing or even painful for us.

It is at these times that we have to remember that the Savior loves those who are disappointing us just as He loves us. It is also helpful to remember that we accomplish nothing by letting ourselves get upset or angry or by seeking revenge in these situations. Our negative feelings don't change the situation. They don't heal anything. All negative feelings do is make us miserable. All they do is increase our pain. And that pain is UNNECESSARY pain because we don’t have to feel it. We bring it upon ourselves by our thinking. If instead of fretting, getting angry or hurt we think about the Savior and know that we can leave all the worry, anger, and hurt with Him, we can live in peace. And peace is a much better place to live in!

The Prince of Peace

The more you study the scriptures, the more you find startling things that at first don’t seem right. You have to stop and ponder them awhile in order to understand them. One of these is the Savior’s statement in Matthew: “Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. (Matt 10:34). Now, this is the man we called the Prince of Peace! What is going on here? The Prince of Peace declares that He has come with a sword?

If we back up a little this begins to make more sense. Jesus is giving his apostles instructions before he sends them out to preach the gospel and he is warning them that they are going to encounter persecution. “Expect it!” He is saying.

We see this still today. Where ever the gospel of Jesus Christ is preached, the adversary fights it in any way he can. He causes parents to refuse to let their children join the Church or children to turn against parents who have decided to join. While the Savior knows that His gospel is peace, He also knows that the acceptance of that gospel is going to cause havoc. Therefore, the gospel is a sword that divides truth from error, good from evil, and light from dark. But it also can separate families, separate us from our comfort zone, or separate us from the material things we love in the world. Sometimes our peace needs to be disturbed so that we can grow!

Sometimes we mistakenly think that if we are doing what we should be doing everything will just work out happily ever after. But often when we are pursuing righteousness, the adversary will do all in his power to thwart us and we will experience times of trouble. We will feel the sword cutting into our lives. But if we hang on to truth, eventually things will work out. Truth will triumph. Peace will triumph. Jesus Christ will triumph.

Living in Peace

Each day I learn a little more about what it means to live in truth. I am grateful for that. Whenever I find myself spinning negative stories, I learn a little more about how to stop the storytelling and make my life freer. I’m discovering that it isn’t just the big situations that cause me to write negative stories. It seems to be more a habit I’ve developed over the years of writing negative stories about everything.

As I work at writing positive stories for the little situations in life I find that more and more the big things take care of themselves. For example: a telephone call takes longer that I thought and makes me late for an appointment. A little thing! But I used to spin a negative story, turn grumpy, stressed and uptight. Those feelings then “poisoned” everything else I did the rest of the day. But now I spin a positive story—“It doesn’t matter.” “I needed to make that call, and it was time well spent”—I stay calm, in a good mood, no “poison” and I’ve practiced spinning positive stories so that in the next big crisis, I’m better able to write a positive story and handle the situation without making myself upset. It is a great way to live!

Maybe this is why truth and peace are so often associated in the scriptures. As Zechariah says, “Love the truth and peace” (Zechariah 8:19). When we live in truth, we live in peace.

Free!

Sometimes life closes in on us and we feel as if we were in a cage desperately trying to find a way out. We bang against the cage bars until we are bruised and we shout for help but no one comes to aid us. In those claustrophobic times, life seems so dismal, but the problem is not so much the cage but the fact that getting out of the cage is all we let ourselves think about.

During those times, I’ve found that if I stop fighting the bars that entrap me and step into the center of the cage—as far from the bars as I can—and then do anything except fight against the cage, things change. After all, even though the cage surrounds me, I can still sing! I can dance! I can commune with my Father in Heaven and let His love and light flood through me. I can love others. I can enjoy the sights beyond the cage. I can breathe in the wonderful aromas that waft through the cage. I can. . . well you get the picture. Despite the cage there is so much to still enjoy.

But the most amazing thing about doing this is that when I step back and concentrate on finding ways to “enjoy” the situation in the cage instead of fighting against it, I suddenly notice that someone has been standing there all along holding open the door. All I needed was to turn around and walk through it.

I hope cage doors open for you today!