Anchoring Yourself

So how do we rid ourselves of unnecessary pain? Over the next few posts we’ll explore some of the things that help. The one I use the most is anchoring. I’ve talked about this before, but anchoring is accomplished by zeroing in on the present moment. Use all your senses to feel, smell, hear, see, and taste the present. Don’t let any stories of the past or worries about the future play in your head. Just Anchor yourself in the present moment. Stop and do it right now and see what happens.

I’ve done this with several groups I’ve spoken to and am amazed that every time I’ve done it the response to what they experienced while anchoring is always the same. In the present moment there is always peace, contentment, happiness, gratitude, love, and hope.

I’ve pondered on this a lot, and I think the reason these wonderful positive things are always there is because the Spirit of Truth always works in the present. In scripture, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost are all called the Spirit of Truth and as we Anchor ourselves in the present we make ourselves available to them. The present is where they can be found and where they can nurture and love us. When we are living our lives by stressing over the past or fretting about the future, we miss the positive gifts they are trying to give us.

So Anchor yourself whenever you feel the anger coming on and see what happens!

Living In Truth (continued)

As we talked about last post, “truth is knowledge of things as they are, and as they were, and as they are to come.” That, of course, includes the principles and doctrines of the gospel, but it also means that the verities of this telestial world such as disease, disappointment, fear, pain, and terrorism are truth. For some reason, these negative things are necessary in a telestial world (See 2 Nephi 2:11), and learning to deal with them is essential to our Exaltation.

As I write this I am being tested. I am on an airplane traveling from Salt Lake City to Austin. It is a long flight especially when a child in the seat directly behind you is constantly (not once in awhile, but constantly!) kicking you in the back. Now this is a telestial situation. (I am assuming that in the celestial world there will be no kicking children!) My responsibility right now (if I want to become like my Father in Heaven) is to deal with this telestial truth in a celestial way. That rules out turning around and yelling at the child. Instead I must accept the truth of the situation and find a way to politely and lovingly deal with it. In other words, I must deal with a telestial situation in a celestial way. That is part of the test of life.

However, if I sit here and keep thinking thoughts such as, “She shouldn’t be kicking me.” “Why didn’t her mother teach her manners?” “The airlines should do something about this!” etc. I am not solving the problem; I am only fighting against truth. Anytime we find ourselves thinking about other people’s behavior or a situation in terms of “should have” or “shouldn’t have,” we are fighting truth and are in a state of anger. The word anger originally meant “troubled or vexed.” Later it took on the connotations of rage that it now includes. But even today the word anger includes a wide range of feelings that trouble us. These feelings range from mild irritation to fury, but they all are troubling and vexing. Thus I am using this word anger to mean “an emotion that occurs when something violates our expectation of what should be.” Whenever we fight against truth, we cause ourselves pain and live in a state of anger.

"Do Not Anger Again"

Nephi’s Psalm found in 2 Ne 4:29-35, begins with a lament over Nephi’s failings and shortcomings. Nephi knows so much, has seen angels, seen visions, been taught by the Lord and yet he still makes mistakes. Obviously this is bothering him, but the Psalm ends with a command to himself: “Do not anger again because of mine enemies.”

I’ve been thinking a lot about anger lately and how it disrupts our lives. The dictionary defines anger as, “a strong feeling of displeasure and usually of antagonism.” This displeasure can range from mild irritation to rage, but it is all anger and is harmful. What the definition doesn’t begin to capture is the damage anger can do to relationships or our health and happiness. Recent studies show that besides causing stress anger can trigger heart attacks and death!

The more I pondered on this the more I realized that if we want to overcome anger in our lives we need to understand what causes the displeasure and antagonism. Surprisingly, the answer to that is simple. Anger occurs when something violates our conviction of what should be. When people think someone should be home at a certain time and they don’t show up, the person gets angry. When a driver cuts in front of a person and the person thinks the driver shouldn’t, they get angry. The list could go on, but anytime we think something should or should not be the way it is, it generates anger. The important thing to realize is we don’t have to become angry. Because we have agency, we can choose to accept what has happened without thinking it shouldn’t have happened. Thus we avoid anger. If we’ve been in the habit of letting anger flare in us, it may be difficult to change, but we can change if we want to.

Nephi seems to be at a point in his life where anger with himself, family, or friends is no longer a problem. But he realizes that nothing good can come from being angry even with his enemies. Whatever point we are at, we too can overcome anger and thereby make our lives happier. As the Old Testament preacher says, “Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools” (Eccl 7:9).
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