Wednesday, January 16, 2013


We've all had the experience of being in a traffic jam, or at a store in a long line waiting to check out and feeling an impatience that begins to churn into anger. "This should be taking so long!" or "Why does this happen on the days when I'm in such a hurry?" or other negative thoughts begin to cause us all kinds of vexation. Vexation is the warning. Vexation is to the spirit what a temperature is to the body. It means, "Something is wrong here."

Left unattended vexation causes more harm to the spirit, just as a fever left unattended can cause damage to the brain and body. Therefore we need to stop when we feel vexation and ask ourselves what is causing it.

For example in the long line as you begin to get upset because the clerk is taking so long, you ask, "Why am I feeling vexed?"

The answer, "Because the clerk is taking so long."

Then you ask, "Can I fix that or do I have to live with it?"

You can't fix it, so to escape Unnecessary Pain, you have to live with it. You take what comes and love it. And how do you do that? We'll be exploring the Truth Tools which help us deal with what comes, but one of the things you can do right then to help you calm down is to ask yourself what Should Shark is preying on you. What is it you think should be happening? The clerk should be faster. The store should have more check out lines. The manager should come help. What ever you are thinking is an expectation--a Should Shark--but it is not the reality or verity of what IS happening. It is not Truth. The only way to get rid of the vexation that is causing you pain, is to let go of the expectation and find a way to deal with the Truth.

You can stand in the line and be in pain, or you can let go of the expectation and stand in the line in peace. The choice is yours and it is that easy.


6L's said...

It sounds so simple but it doesn't FEEL easy, lol. I do try and remind myself there's nothing I can do, but I still tend to be frustrated with things out of my control. Issues with people tend to vex me the most....why do they act that way, or why would they think I would purposely be hurtful when I was trying to be helpful. Not sure how to change the way I feel in these situations. I suppose I need more practice! Thanks for your blog. :)

Sherrie Mills Johnson said...

6L's, You hit it right on. It does take practice. When you first feel the vexing feeling use the questions. Can you fix it? If you can't laugh at yourself for making yourself miserable and watch what happens. Let me know how it works!